Joe Biden Is The Candidate America Needs Because He Is The Candidate We Deserve

Last night, I watched the results for the primaries come in. Not surprisingly, Joe Biden seems to have emerged as the most signficant winner of everyone. There are several reasons for this, including the participation of the Boomers in politics and the general lack of participation from the Millennials and Zoomers.

(Disclaimer: This article is written in jest, but with a serious point)

However, there is another side I would like to explore, and that is why Joe Biden truly should receive the nomination because he is the candidate America deserves. I’m not endorsing him, and I’m not saying that he is good or bad, but that as I have noted, as all politicians are reflections of the population at some level, when people look at Joe Biden, perhaps they are not looking at somebody who is particularly unique, but rather a reflection of themselves.

Let’s have a look at five reasons why Joe Biden is the candidate America needs because he is the candidate we deserve.

1) Joe Biden clearly shows signs of senility, dementia, or other age-related memory loss.

A lot of people have attacked Biden for his statements that indicate failures of memory or incoherent thoughts. However, if one takes the politically-charged aspect out of this and looks at him as a human being- which politicians are -Biden seems to exhibit signs of age-related senility, dementia, or other forms of age-related memory loss. One can see this many times in one’s own family with loved ones who start saying strange things only to be medically diagnosed with such a condition.

Now we have no clear, definitive proof that such is the case. We only know what we can see, but the observations suggest some disconnect between Biden’s cognitive functions and the rest of him. And this is why we need him.

Americans suffer from a collective political amnesia. This exists among both parties, for many times, especially among the common political worshiper (a.k.a. the average citizen), a statement made months ago that caused a controversy is almost immediately forgotten, and five to ten years might as well be a lifetime ago for many. Before 9/11, the average man knew nothing of what Islam was, on 9/12 he became an overnight expert, and by 9/11/19, a lot of people had forgotten a lot of what they knew about Islam or they were saying the exact same talking points from 2001, if they were that old. Many Zoomers have no idea about 9/11 or Islam and its effects save for placing it into a context of migration and borderline racialist politics.

But it does not have to be just Islam. Whether it is SARS, ZIKA, Coronavirus (as it is right now), Mitt Romney, or the newest fad on social media, what is the rage one moment is forgotten the next as though it never existed and only shows up in ridiculous articles from BuzzFeed with titles such as “Ten things from your childhood that are why the (1980s/1990s/2000s/2010s) were the best time in history”.

Biden has some sort of mental amnesia, and so does the American public. It’s a match made in heaven.

2) Biden shows signs of doing creepy or sexually deviant behavior towards women and small children.

Biden has sometimes been called “uncle Joe” because he acts like, as some Americans use the phrase, “that creepy uncle” which families will see only once in a while. Biden does have a history of touching women and children, right in public on camera for the world to see, in creepy ways that are something that one might see a pedophile do. One only needs to look at photos of Biden to see this.

But why should this be considered a bad thing as far at the American public is concerned (note: I’m not justifying his behavior, because such things are objectively not good)? America is the leading producer of pornography in the world, and as I have consistently pointed out, porn is so influential that it is a major driver of change in social policy and technological usage. If porn does it or uses it, it is going to be used and propagated to the general public. If hogs and chickens are “corn fed” than Americans are “porn fed” in that it feeds our social consciousness and lifestyle.

Americans also love all things of Sodom. As Ted, Walid, and I have consistently pointed out, the sodomite movement wants to lower the age of consent so they can rape children, because homosexual ephebophilia and pedophilia are both associated historically with sodomites and are commonly practiced among them. The most common sexual fantasy of Americans is “lesbians”, and this has existed for years. Likewise, it is a known fact that major porn advocacy groups such as the “Free Speech Coalition” are working towards the legalization of child pornography by the evisceration of child protection laws such as the 2257 notice that porn companies are forced to verify all ages by record and have them available for inspection by the general public. Very few people have seriously opposed this, and advances only continue to be made in the legal system towards legitimizing it in numerous ways.

While we cannot definitively say if Biden is a pervert, as we can only infer such from his actions and would need clearer proof to definitively ascertain such, if he is proven to be so, how would that be different from the average American? He has already said he will stand for sodom, and if he is going to stand for that and all that comes with it, what is the difference between Biden’s actions and those of the American public, except he does his things in public while most do such in the privacy of their apartments and homes?

3) Biden’s family is a mess with deadbeat fathers, drug addicts, and porn addicts.

I hate to sound cruel, but a lot of American parents are terrible at caring for children. It is too common to hear about how in spite of “I did my best”, so many American children wind up addicted to drugs, porn, or have children out of wedlock in broken families. This is not an accident, but a product of family failure beginning with the parents.

However, not to worry, if you are concerned about being a bad parent, Biden is the candidate to choose. His son Hunter Biden has a history of cocaine addiction, purchasing strippers and prostitutes, and having children with a stripper and refusing to pay even after it was discovered that the child is his.

What could be more American than a family with television levels of dysfunctionality such as the Bidens?

4) Biden says crazy things.

Some might say it is the fact that almost a quarter of the population is on anti-psychotic medicine. Some say it is genetics. Some say it is chemicals in the water. However, every American knows that other Americans do not like talking to each other people there are tons of crazy people around, and everybody is afraid of being in a conversation with them. People will start fights, lose friendships, cause job losses, and bring about havoc because of minor disagreements, especially with political parties, and when they are not dividing each other among themselves, they are fighting over things that are just irrelevant or talking about weird, strange, or just socially off-putting topics.

If craziness is so widespread, then it should be accepted more, and that is where Biden can be your “loon” who will sing along with our social tune! Biden has already confessed his love of cockroaches, how he put “Palm Aid” in his hair, how he stood up to the gangster named “Corn Pop”, and how he has hairy legs and he liked when children rubbed his hairy legs as well as kids jumping on his lap which he “loved”.

Biden also knows how to throw out the insults, like when he called one woman a “lying dog faced pony soldier.”

Remember, he also said he would “beat the hell out of Trump”.

Maybe if gets the Democrat nomination, he will call Trump something along the lines of a “meanie poopie head” on national television. It would be better than anything on Comedy Central, and if he became president, Comedy Central would have to relocate to CBS, CNN, or NBC since Biden statements to world leaders would be to die for.

Let’s face it, if almost 40% of Americans are not going to buy Corona beer because of fear of the coronavirus, is Biden not the perfect gaffe-generating machine that we should have representing us and our foolish behavior as a people?

Perhaps instead of invading the Middle East, Africa, and other countries, we could have boxing matches. Biden could face off in “The Octagon” with President Xi of China, or perhaps President Kim Jong Un of North Korea. He makes Putin’s shirtless horse riding in the snows of Siberia look tame, and his pre-fight “trash talk” would dwarf anything that Connor McGregor said before his fight with Khabib Nurmagomeddov, and we all know that once he is in the ring, he would fight with a fury like it was when Mike Tyson fought against Evander Holyfield.

5) Biden will talk about God but doesn’t know anything about him.

Americans love to talk about God and the Constitution, but not only do not practice the values embodied in them frequently, but often don’t know much of either.

But ignorance should not cause fear, because if one does not know, one can stand proudly with Biden, since he doesn’t know them either.


I have made the above points in jest, but there is a serious point behind this. It is that all politicians are reflections of the people who they serve at some level, for good or for bad.

I don’t support Biden, and a lot of his actions are creepy and not good. The man really should be at home resting in his final years, not on a stage campaigning.

What we see with Biden- the memory loss, the sexually questionable behavior, the broken family, the erratic statements, and the irreligious religiousity -are all found among the American people.

Biden is not unique. He is a reflection of the people in society and our problems. His problems are obvious, and not everybody has them or in the same way, but they all exist in some way.

Much of what Biden says and does is the average American.

That is why he is the candidate America should have or needs, but deserves, because he is our reflection back in a mirror.

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